Ok, so I forgot to mention the "camera argument". As we were driving to the mall, hubby and B start talking about photography. B mentions that he has a camera from his grandfather that took 8X10 pictures, really old, probably worth some money if it hadn't been sitting in a garage rotting all these years.
M says "oh, is that the camera they used for the carnival?" (B's family is carny folk, little hands, smell like cabbage). B says "no, it's just a camera". M says "Oh, didn't they use to take pictures at the carnival?" B says "yes, but not this camera". M says.... you get the picture, it went on for 10 miles.
So, M comes out of the bedroom from her pout because I wouldn't let her carry anything inside, and sees that hubby is prepping dinner and asks if she can help. "no" he says, he's got it all under control. M runs back to the guest room to pout again. Whatever.
Hubby puts on the apron she made him and starts grilling, except now we know why nobody wears aprons when they grill, because they catch on fire. No, he didn't set the apron on fire, I would have gotten reaction photos of that, but meanwhile M is hiding and he's wearing the stupid apron just to appease her. She finally comes out, sees him wearing the apron and gets her camera all proud. She comes back, and as hubby is trying to move food on the grill so it won't burn in a flare up, asks him to pose. He explains (as flames are shooting up) that he's a bit busy now. She pouts.
We have salmon and steak. Very tasty. They only eat a bit. M says brightly "ooh, tomorrow I can make a steak sandwich". Hubby and I nearly choke to death on our food.
THE STORY OF THE STEAK SANDWICH
Back in 1988 when we got married, as a gift to us, the in-laws used their timeshare to get us booked into a nice golf resort in Florida, then a Disney visit, then a cruise WITH THEM. Great honeymoon, eh?
After a week at the gold resort, then half a week at Disney we're packing up to drive to Port Canaveral to catch the boat. We're in a hurry, it's 8am.
M: Would anyone want this piece of steak that I have?
Us: no
(note: we hadn't eaten steak for a week, we've been staying at resorts without a fridge, it was wrapped in a paper napkin)
M: I could put it between two slices of bread and you can have a sandwich.
Us: no
M: I could put a little mayonaise on it
(note: we didn't have condiments, so I'm guessing she stashed the mayo in her purse with the steak lump)
Us: NO
M to hubby: are you sure you don't want this steak, I can make it into a sandwich.
Hubby: no
M to J: I can put some mayo on it
J: no
M to me: are you sure you don't want it?
(note: later on we decided we should have just said yes and thrown it out)
Me: I'm sure I don't want the steak.
M: its a perfectly good piece of steak
Me: I'm sure it is, I'm not hungry
She made two more rounds with the steak before she gave up.
Back to present day.
After pronouncing that a steak sandwich would be nice, she then got the brainstorm of freezing the steak and the salmon and taking it on the flight back with them as a snack.
Hubby and I got up from the table, gathered the dishes, went inside and threw up while we laughed.
