I'm sitting in the nook hiding, M stands in the doorway and says "do you know if anyone is in the bathroom?" NO!
Despite telling them they can use the upstairs bathroom, they insist on using the downstairs bathroom... and they don't flush the toilet (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH).
There is only a hand towel in the downstairs bathroom, so M asks me, in that high squeeky voice and convoluted way that she needs a towel and wash cloth. Except it comes out something like this:
"I was thinking of freshning up a bit, but there isn't a washcloth and towel in the downstairs bathroom, so I was wondering if you happened to have a washcloth and a towel that I can use here in the downstairs bathroom?"
We're about ready to go to a mall... I'm sure I'll be updating soon.