So, our plan was to keep them in the truck as long as humanly possible so they couldn't bicker about things. That was our first mistake.
11:30am off we go to Starbucks because we both needed a latte to wake up. Of course, there was yet another discussion about the collectible starbucks bears, and the purchase of more collectible starbucks bears, and how they use to have a label sewn near the bottom, but now they put a little patch on their feet... kill me.
To the camera store, hubby decided to get a digital SLR camera, which earlier had prompted B to "talk" to me about his concerns about said camera, and how he wanted to plop down $200 toward the new camera, yadda yadda, whatever. Of course, the camera he wanted was THE MOST wanted camera out there, and they didn't have it. To Best Buy in Laurel, they didn't have it, but they had a version of it in Columbia, but we had to go to Glen Burnie, where they didn't have it. Drove to Annapolis Mall, where they had a demo of it, but it had a scratch on the lens. I ran off to buy my bag and boots. M pouted because "us girls" didn't go off shopping.
They announced they were hungry, but couldn't come up with what they were hungry for, so we suggested the food court, since there was a wide variety of foods there. We start walking down to the food court (about 10 miles away). As we walked ahead of them (they insist that we walk ahead of them), we softly threaten violence on them because they lag about 20 feet behind us at all times. If we slow down, they slow down, if we stop, they stop. Sometimes they stop or go into a store, we don't realize it, they've disappeared, we have to go back and find them and they scurry out of the store and apologize. Once again we start walking, they start lagging... it's maddening. For people "who just want to spend some time with us" why the F are they walking 20 feet behind us?
We finally get to the food court, and we decide to get Arbys. We go up to order, and there they are right behind us, looking at the Arby menu, arguing over the type of salad, asking the counter people if they can get a pre-made salad without some things (no, they are pre-made, that's what you get), upset because Arby's doesn't have a particular soda, wanted a sandwich on a bun type they don't carry... WHY EAT THERE THEN????? They proceeded to complain about the food while we ate.
It took us 4 hours to make the slow death march back to the truck. Off to another camera store, where we finally find the camera and all the stuff hubby wanted. FINE!!!! As we're paying for it, B starts having a royal snit because he wants to pay his $200 bucks toward the purchase, and literally starts yelling at us about allowing him the courtesy of giving us a gift. There's nothing that says gift like a good berating. This was after the "talk" he had with me about how he had no idea where hubby gets his quick temper from... gee, I don't know.
By now, its 4pm, the dogs have been locked up all day, so we decide to go back home to let them out for a bit and feed them. We still hadn't copied the 6,000 pieces and bits of paper that B brought for hubby to copy, so we decide to do that after the dogs have been let out and fed. So, as we're driving home, M starts asking us about the navigation system in the 4-runner. Does the nav system work just in our area or nationwide (nationwide), do we pay a monthly fee for it (no), how does it work (we explain), how is it different from Onstar? (we explain), do you have to pay a fee for Onstar (yes), does that mean they can raise the fee for onstar? (don't know), well, what's the difference between our system and onstar (we don't know a whole lot about onstar, because we don't have onstar), well if one would get onstar, is their navigation system nationwide? (don't know), do you think onstar would be a good thing to have (don't know), what cars do they put onstar in? (don't know, WE DON'T KNOW!!!!!).
Get home, and because we didn't know everything there was to know about Onstar, M goes into the guest room to pout while hubby goes through the camera stuff with B, I go off to hide, play with the dogs, etc.
Around 7pm, we decided we need to go out and get the stupid papers copied. Off we go to Kinkos, get some copier cards and start to copy all the crap. M and I pair off while B and hubby take another pile. M stands there criticizing all of the "crap" B has brought, and "you would think that his parents were the king and queen of England for all the hoopla he makes over them", blah, blah, blah. As we're copying some documents, B reads aloud (very aloud) "hey look, here's a notation where my great, great, great whatever owned and sold slaves!" Oh lovely.
Then their phone rings, M answers it and is yelling in the phone (for everyone at Kinkos to hear). "What? Our flight is cancelled?" I have a total meltdown, nearly crumble into a heap at the base of the copy machine. Turns out that their flight was booked too full, so they were putting them on an EARLIER flight WOOOOHOOOO, instead of 11am, they were leaving at 10am. thank gawd!
So, after an hour and a half of sniping, rude remarks, and other drama, we get all the papers copied and ask them if they are hungry. Yes, they are hungry. Where do you want to eat? Wherever we want to eat. For the love of... FINE, we head for Baja Fresh. They are closed (its now 9pm). B spots the Golden Corral (oh for the love of...) FINE, so off to Golden Corral we go. As we pass the mall, M asks about the Medievel Times place (NOOOOOOOOO they're closed), what do they do there, is that a dinner theater? We don't know. Do they have plays there? We don't know. Do you dress up and have dinner there? WE DON'T KNOW!!!!
Get into Golden Corral and B demands that he pay for it (gladly, I'm not paying for this swill), M literally screams WE GET THE SENIOR DISCOUNT to the poor cashier. We get our trays and proceed to select from the scads of food that has probably been sitting out all day. Mind you, its a buffet, yet M gets a whole bunch of stuff, B gets his stuff, then M starts unloading half of her stuff onto B's plate. Why? don't know. The "waitress" brings some rolls, I ask if they have honey in them (allergic), she says no, but the butter pats do. Ok, don't eat the butter pats. B offers to find me non-honey butter. No thanks. I can get you some, I'll go find it. Why don't you just sit down and eat, I don't want butter. I can ask if they have non-honey butter. No, really, don't need it. He gets up, whatever.
M declares that the chicken is delicious, I say that I think its a bit dry, she stops eating her chicken and pouts. She finishes everything but the chicken, then asks B if he wants to share dessert with her. No, he'll go find his own dessert. She stomps off furious now. She comes back with a variety of stuff, and complains about all of it. During this whole time, if one of them leaves, the other would bitch about the one that was gone. B complaining that he makes M mad all the time, M complaining that B never listens to her.
By now its like 10pm and we go home. M stomps off to the guestroom while B and hubby test out the new camera and talk. M pokes her head out every once in a while, peeved that B isn't helping her pack. B decides that midnight is the time for the son and dad talk (which he had 5 freakin days to do), hubby finally breaks away and runs to bed, where we lay and vent for a good hour.
